Who would win in a fight: Lieder über Liebe or Paw Pads?
The internet is for many things, the most important of which is discussing who would win in fights. Who would win in a fight between Superman and Batman? Who would win in a fight between Superman and Goku? Who would win in a fight between Batman and Goku? We know the answers to all of those questions. Now that Zipwok has released the long-awaited album Paw Pads, about a year after Shiv released their debut album Lieder über Liebe, we can finally answer this question that the universe has always needed an answer to: Who would win in a fight, Lieder über Liebe or Paw Pads?
To be clear, this is NOT meant to answer the question, "Which one is a better album?" The question, specifically, is "Which album would win IN A FIGHT?" Biting, scratching, dodging, blocking, and going for the kill, today we are going to analyze each album's stats and moves, and determine which of the two has what it takes to come out on top when the leashes are unclipped.
Obviously we are going to consider both albums to be bloodlusted, meaning that both are fighting to the best of their ability regardless of their feelings about each other: pacifism is not on the table.
Once both combatants have been studied and their stats have been figured out, we will be using a high-tech computer simulation to run 10,000 battles and determine an ultimate winner once and for all.
Those who have already listened to Paw Pads will know that the chief feature of this album is its agility. From dazzling fingerpicking to mastery of the esoteric 9/8 time signature, this album stays on its toes, and will leave opponents tripping over themselves trying to keep up.
Meanwhile, Lieder über Liebe is an album with TEETH, and an album that can STUN. One moment, you're mesmerized by foretold visions of apocalypse, and then while you're defenseless, WHAM, your traitorous ex-dog texts you devastating pictures of himself and your wife getting pup-cups at the beach together, and then just when you think it's over, WHAM, this album gores you straight through the emotions.
For all of these reasons, we are going to give Paw Pads a demi-god-like evasion score of 29 (TWENTY NINE!!!), and we are going to account for all of Lieder über Liebe's special moves in the simulation. Some of Lieder über Liebe's moves MAY be able to stun Paw Pads long enough to land a fatal hit, IF Lieder über Liebe can even land any initial hit at all to begin a stunlock spiral on the all-but-untouchable Paw Pads.
Lieder über Liebe may have a hyper-significantly higher baseline damage value, comfortably occupying tier 8-C without breaking a sweat and even able to attain tier 5 for a finishing blow, but if your target is on a whole other planet by the time your attack has finished getting out of bed, then you're still going to be doing 0 damage where it actually counts.
And of course, Lieder über Liebe has a runtime of 46 minutes and therefore has 46 HP, while Paw Pads has a runtime of 67 minutes and therefore has 67 HP.
With all of that said, here's the final breakdown that we're looking at:
Lieder über Liebe by Shiv:
ATTACK: 16-39
TARGETING: 9
EVASION: 13
HP: 46
SPECIAL MOVES+
Paw Pads by Zipwok:
ATTACK: 4-5
TARGETING: 4
EVASION: 29
HP: 67
WARNING: CRITICAL EVASION LEVELS
With all of the numbers and facts in place, let's run the simulation 10,000 times, and determine once and for all which album would win in a fight, Lieder über Liebe or Paw Pads...
Paw Pads would win in a fight against Lieder über Liebe!
Regardless of which of these two albums you might like better, Paw Pads decisively wins when it comes to the two of them getting in a fight, with a victory rate of 6,571 to 3,429.
Congratulations to Zipwok for creating such a beastly champion with this new album. Shiv, better luck next time.
Article written by Eggshell Ghosthearth
btw if you're curious, Paw Pads and Lieder über Liebe are also both really good albums as far as the music in them, I've listened to both of them a lot and really enjoy all of the animal/zoo/therian themes that are showcased here :3 Links if you wanna check them out:
